I sat on the couch yesterday morning with a cup of coffee in the quiet.
My muscles ached from a round trip 5 hour drive yesterday.
The boys are spending a few weeks with their dad’s family and my heart is achey and empty.
When Cade is tired or he’s had a long, hard day (as long and hard as your day can be as a 5 year old), he’ll tell me, “But my legs are tired! Carry me!”
There are times when it’s just easier to carry him, times when I know his short legs must be tired and I’ll scoop him up, but sometimes, there are times when I insist that he just keep walking until we get to our destination.
I’ll grab his hand and tell him, “My legs are tired too, buddy. Hold my hand and we’ll walk together. We’re almost there.”
I keep wondering when things will fall into place. I long for something, anything to make the least bit of sense.
I keep praying for things to change, and all I hear Him say is, “Not now. Not yet. Not today.”
He’s telling me to keep going, keep walking, keep pushing forward… He’s there, walking beside me and holding my hand and reassuring me that we’re almost there…